1. That I can be awkward without ridicule and
naked without shame. Forgive me. This is the reason for all the times I
sporadically break into what I think is makossa. And for the unhealthy
amount of time I spend in the same boxers every weekend. Forgive me.
2. That we are slowly evolving beyond the need for
unnecessary talk. So, look at me now over any dinner table and I will
tell you whether you’re saying: “I take God beg you, stop eating
that thing as if you don’t see peppered chicken regularly”; or “I take
God beg you, eat and pack take-away, because I am not cooking jack when
we get home, you hear?”
3. Have I ever told you? Everything about you
smells like perfume, even your morning breath. True. It smells like
Chanel. And I love it!
4. Those nights when you are sleeping and I get to
sit there watching you, yes, but not like Willy-Willy, don’t worry;
just thinking – ‘seriously, how did a nerd like me end up with a top to bottom if you doubt it check the label complete chikito like you?’ You
know? I like it. Those nights you wake up, and we get to lie there
gisting – like friends, not lovers – in the darkness. In fact, I love
it.
5. I feel safe enough to say these things, you
know? I am afraid, I don’t know, I feel my life is spinning out of
control. You know? You keep my secrets. Better still, you forgive me for
having them at all.
6. The way we fight these days, not at all like
before, when your mouth was Ogbunigwe, and my expertise was 7 days
silence. Sometimes, I still ask myself - what the hell were we smoking?
Trying to knock out the teeth of somebody you will wake up next week and
try to kiss? What? Biko, I like the way we do it now, like boxers
planning to retire without debilitating head injuries.
7. Our children. Sometimes, they smile like you.
Sometimes, they frown like you. Sometimes, they sit there
absent-mindedly singing, “oyigiyigi o o o’, just because they
hear it blaring out of your car stereo every morning on the way to
school. You see, I like the way they are beginning to resemble you, down
to the same nervous break down at the possible sighting of a cockroach…
In fact, I love it.
8. You are the color of our carpet, the paintings
on our wall, the two armchairs that sit in a corner, straight out of a
John Lewis brochure, but made for a fraction of the price by the local
carpenter you found. Undisputed: you are the reason I live in the
coziest, coolest, (never mind the buckets we have to put here and there
to catch the drip when it rains), most beautiful house I have ever lived
in. Undisputed: you are my home.
Written by Dike Chukwumerije
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